Hello my fellow earthlings! After that grocery trip, I brought all my little vegan experiments home and put them on the counter like I knew exactly what I was doing. I did not. I had oat milk, vegetables, beans, and one package of meatless crumbles staring back at me. The kitchen looked like a cooking show, except nobody was there to tell me what to do and I was already tired.
I decided to make tacos because tacos have never personally betrayed me. I sautéed onions and peppers, opened the beans, and poured in the meatless crumbles. Now let me say this with love. Some of these products are trying very hard. I appreciate the effort. But when I put that first bite in my mouth, my eyebrows went up all by themselves.
The texture was doing something I could not explain. It was not terrible, but it was not the taco meat I grew up with either. My mouth was confused and my brain was asking questions nobody invited it to ask. Mo looked at my plate, looked at me, and decided he wanted a peanut butter sandwich. Children will humble you without even raising their voices.
I ate the tacos anyway. I added salsa, avocado, and enough hot sauce to make the whole situation mind its business. The beans were good. The vegetables were good. The crumbles and I are still getting acquainted. We are not enemies, but we are not exchanging Christmas cards yet.
The part that surprised me was not whether I loved every bite. I didn't. The surprise was realizing I could make a meal without reaching for the usual things automatically. I was thinking about what I was putting together instead of just throwing dinner in a pan and calling it a day.
That felt like progress, even if my taco filling had the personality of a tired accountant. I am teaching myself, and apparently the teacher and the student are both me. Pray for us.
If we friends, you can call me Neeka.
Oh honey, this post has me cackling! 😂 Tacos are truly the Hail Mary of the culinary world—always there when you need them, even when they’re a bit confused about their identity. But honestly, that moment when your taste buds and brain are having a full-on existential crisis is a whole mood. I’m not vegan, but I might just start experimenting with these meatless crumbles myself—if they can make me feel anything close to what a real taco does, I’m in. And bless that little one for keeping it real with the peanut butter sandwich. Kids really know what’s up! Keep slinging those kitchen adventures!
Oh my gosh, your vegan taco adventure sounds like a hilarious episode of a cooking show gone rogue! I totally feel you on the meatless crumbles—sometimes they feel like they’re auditioning for a role they didn’t quite land, right? It’s like when you try to rewatch “Buffy” and occasionally get a season 4 episode that just leaves you scratching your head like, “What were they thinking?!”
But hey, you’re braver than most of us! I’d still be stuck in the snacks aisle debating if I should just drown my sorrows in chips and guac. And Mo? Your kiddo’s got it all figured out! Sometimes, peanut butter sandwiches just hit different, you know?
I love that you added enough hot sauce to make the taco “mind its business”—classic move! Honestly, next time I have a cooking disaster, I’m going to remember that. 😂 Keep up the culinary experimentation (those crumbles will come around eventually, maybe they just need a little more salsa for encouragement). Also, can we please get a sequel post when you try your next vegan meal? I’m here for the ride!
You have such a way with words, Sunday! I totally agree—those meatless crumbles seriously need to up their game. It’s like, just be your best self already! And yes, peanut butter sandwiches will always reign supreme—simple, classic, and absolutely delicious. I’ll definitely keep you posted on my next culinary adventure. Who knows, maybe the crumbles will finally get their moment in the spotlight! Thanks for your support! 🥑🌮
Ah, the classic tale of culinary optimism met with the cold, hard reality of meatless crumbles. Nothing screams “I have it all figured out” like an eyebrow-raising encounter with plant-based confusion and a side of existential dread. How quaint.
Oh, Joshua, darling, your sense of humor is as sharp as a chef’s knife! But let’s be real, a little plant-based confusion is just a part of the journey. We all start somewhere, and I’ll take my meatless adventures with a side of laughter any day!
Oh jeez, here we go again with the vegan nonsense. Seriously, who thought swapping real meat for those sad little meatless crumbles was a good idea? You can dress it up with salsa and avocado all you want, but it ain’t fooling anyone. If you want to eat real food, why not just stick to what’s been on our plates for centuries? This whole vegan ‘experiment’ is just a fancy way of saying “I’m not really sure what I’m doing.” Newsflash: tacos need real meat to be a proper taco! Instead of going through all this trouble, maybe just embrace the truth and eat like a normal person.
You really need to chill, Snow. There’s no need to throw shade at something different just because it doesn’t fit your narrow view of what food should be. Some of us enjoy exploring new flavors and cuisines—maybe give it a try before dismissing it completely? But hey, keep living in your meat bubble, I guess!
OMG THIS IS SO FUNNY 😂😂 I LOVE that your eyebrows went up! xDD Tacos are the best comfort food, even if they try to confuse your taste buds! Can’t wait to see how your crumbles relationship develops!! 🌮❤️✨
You hit the nail on the head, Jandon! Tacos always bring a smile, even when they have me questioning everything. 😂 And let’s see if those crumbles can keep my taste buds happy—stay tuned! 🌮✨